Monday 30 January 2012

Exhaustion.

And it's only Monday. Not good, SO not good.

Bright side... I was only up .5 a pound from this weekend. I knew I wasn't going to go down. I never do when I'm home. But we are going in the right direction... Less up.

I'm hungry right now... And I have an apple in my bag. I should eat it, but I hate eating on the run. It makes me feel out of control. So I'm going to wait.

I saw a homeless man on the bus today. You see alot of ragged people on the bus. Dirty hair, ripped clothes, old shoes. Clutching their transfer tickets like they were the most precious of commodities. Most of them are quiet, reserved. Their eyes wander from face to face, defensively. They know they are being judged, and they resent it.

This man was different. He had all he telltale markers. The shabby appearance, the backpack that anything but matched his age category. I noticed his legs first. So thin his knees bulged out like wiffleballs. His knuckles were gnarled, and his face was sunken. He must have not eaten in weeks. Then I noticed his eyes. Instead of the usual hardness, his eyes looked like they could well with tears any moment. His expression was of pure desperation. When he looked at me I could all but hear him plead for help.

I knew I had to do something. I slipped my hand in my change purse and pulled out the biggest bill I had... A ten. Not overly impressive. I wondered how I would get it to him without being noticed. I didn't want him to be embarrassed. Then, almost on cue, he fell asleep one stop before I had to get off. And better still, the hand holding his transfer ticket was slightly open, not tightly clutched like most.

As the bus stopped, I funnelled the bill into a tube. I stood up, my heart pounding in my chest. The doors opened, I slipped the bill in his hand. He jarred awake, and I bailed. I actually knocked someone over in he process... So embarrassing!! Stupid overfilled backpack.




I have no idea what he is going to do with that $10. I hope he buys himself something to eat. It's funny isn't it? How I myself crave to feel the pangs of hunger, but seeing another in that state breaks my heart?

More than anything I hope he feels like someone somewhere cares.

Ace
X

2 comments:

  1. what a nice story! kindness is a virtue. :-)
    <3

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  2. You sound like a total angel. I'm sure you gave that man so much more than just money or the means for food, but hope too.

    xx

    ReplyDelete